[Cut to mess hall kitchen in Three Mile camp. Jili is creeping inside late
at night, looking for a snack. He digs around a bit and finds several bread
rolls, an unopened jug of wine, and some other food. He places all of these
items on a tray and starts to head out the door when one of the mess hall
soldiers walks in, so he hurriedly hides the tray behind his back]

Soldier [sternly]: Su Jili, what are you doing?

Jili: Sir, I. I really don't know what got into me. I know I shouldn't, but
I couldn't help myself.[turns tail and runs out the door with his tray of
food]

[Cut to secluded spot inside camp. Jili is happily digging into a roast
chicken drumstick. After a few bites, he seems to lose interest and then
takes a swig from the jug. His face starts to frown; he is probably sore
that Mulan has "run off" with Li Liang on their adventures and he was left
behind. He gets up and walks to the window, still frowning and muttering
under his breath. He hears a stealthy step behind him and turns to see who
it is]

Jili: Who goes there? [The Outhouse Goddess shows up]

Outhouse Goddess: I came here to congratulate you. Why are you so quick to
jump on me?

Jili: What is there to congratulate?

Outhouse Goddess: Hua Mulan has successfully completed her tour of duty and
hasn't fouled up in any shocking way. You have completed the mission the
Jade Emperor gave you. You should return to the Celestial Palace now. [Sees
he isn't responding] Hey! Did you hear that? You should report to the Jade
Emperor soon.

Jili [testily]: I'll decide when I go back. I don't need you to boss me
about that.

Outhouse Goddess [annoyed]: I'm doing this for your own good. If the Jade
Emperor knew that you refuse to go home, he won't be terribly pleased. I'd
hate to be in your shoes.

Jili: Stop blathering about things that don't concern you. I want to spend
some more time down here in the mortal realm so I can try out all the
different foods and eat my fill before returning, because once I return, I
may never get this opportunity again.

Outhouse Goddess [smirking]: That's a lame excuse.

Jili: What do you mean?

Outhouse Goddess: You're not doing this for food, but for love.

Jili: What are you talking about?

Outhouse Goddess: You aren't willing to give up Hua Mulan, that's why you
consistently refuse to return to the immortal realm, isn't that right?

Jili: You're talking nonsense!

Outhouse Goddess: I suggest you give up this dream. Immortals and mortals
may not mix. She is a mortal; how could she ever be fit for an immortal like
you? Now, WE two are a destined pair. [Jili bursts out in loud laughter,
much to the Outhouse Goddess's great chagrin]

Jili [hooting]: Us? We are a destined pair? I'm telling you, I have my
standards. Do you have the nerve to think you have anything that is good
enough for me?

Outhouse Goddess: So you think I'm not pretty enough for you?

Jili: That goes without saying. Don't you feel ashamed even saying that out
loud? Actually [giggling], every time I see you, I want to vomit.

Outhouse Goddess: I don't blame you for preferring someone that is much more
polished. I can act just as polished, though.

Jili [incredulous]: You?
Outhouse Goddess: Just point out any young lady in the city that you feel is
beautiful. I will use my magic to occupy her body and then we can fulfill
our destiny together.

Jili [looking somewhat disgusted, then giggles again]: Even if you became
the most beautiful woman in the world. I still wouldn't like you! Mulan may
not be the most beautiful woman in the world, but she has a certain spark.
She is kind and brave. She always does the honorable thing and would never
deliberately hurt someone else. She has so many good qualities that I can't list
them all.

Outhouse Goddess: It doesn't matter how many pluses she has; she's not
yours. She cares for Li Liang. They were made soulmates long before you came
on the scene. You may as well give up.

Jili [getting mad]: Shut up!

Outhouse Goddess: Who do you think you are? Compared to Li Liang, you are
just a pile of cow dung. Hua Mulan would never fall for a coward like you.

Jili [furious]: If I don't tear you to pieces today I don't deserve to live!

[Tries to attack her, but her magic is superior and he can't lay a hand on
her]

[Cut to tavern where Mulan and Li Liang have taken temporary jobs. Li Liang
is kneading dough to make noodles. When finished, he uses some strange
martial arts moves to turn the lumpy dough into many, many strands of thin
noodles. Tired and out of breath, he sits down for a breather while Mulan
busily waits on customers. She comes by to check on him]

Li Liang: Mulan, are you tired?

Mulan [sitting down next to him]: No, I'm not tired. [Takes a sip of tea]

Li Liang: You're not? Well, I am very tired. [Mulan gets an idea and jumps
up, then walks over to Li Liang, where she begins to give him a shoulder
massage. He sighs in pleasure] Where did you learn how to do this?
Mulan: Um... [tries to think of something that won't reveal her secret], I
learned it from an old lady that comes here all the time for tea. She said
it was a good way to make money, so I asked her to teach me.

Li Liang: Perfect! In future, instead of just getting jobs at taverns we
visit on our travels, you can even make some additional income using your
skill. [Mulan starts to pout at the thought of giving strangers massages.
She obviously wants to reserve it for "special" people like Li Liang. The
shopkeeper walks in and addresses Li Liang]

Shopkeeper: Tell you what, you can stop working for a minute. My business
has increased a lot since you two started working here. I'm going to double
your pay. How's that sound? [Li Liang thinks a minute, then shakes his head.
Mulan follows his example] Not enough? Well. how about if I triple your pay?
[Li Liang thinks a minute, then shakes his head. Mulan again follows his
example]

Li Liang: It isn't a question of money. It's just that it is time for us to
move on. Comrade, let's head out! [Mulan follows him out of the tavern]
[Cut to street in the city. Mulan and Li Liang are walking along when she
stops in the middle of the road. She beckons him over]
Mulan [eyes fixed on a street vendor's stall up ahead]: Do you hear that
sound?

Li Liang: What sound?

Mulan: It's my stomach growling. How about we stop for a bite to eat?
[Points to the stall she wants to visit]

Li Liang: Hungry again? Let's go! [They go and sit down at the noodle
vendor's stall and order] Two bowls of noodles, please.

Mulan: And a plate of salt beef, a plate of spicy chicken, and a plate of
pickled squash.

Li Liang [protesting]: Make that just the two bowls of noodles. [To Mulan]
That's too much food. We won't be able to finish it. [Seeing Mulan's
protesting face, he whispers to her] We need to be careful with our money;
we don't have much left. [Stifling a groan, she lays her head on the table
and whimpers]

[Next scene shows Mulan and Li Liang finishing their meal. He has finished
one bowl of noodles, while there is a stack of six or seven empty bowls in
front of Mulan. She is literally licking clean the last bowl, which she sets
down with a sigh after she is finished]

Li Liang: I thought I told you that we are running short of money. [Eyes the
stack of empty bowls] I'm not sure if we have enough to cover all of this.

Mulan: Then what are we going to do? [The vendor places another plate of
bread rolls before them]

Li Liang: Hey, sir, we didn't order this.

Vendor: Don't worry, the gentleman over there has already paid your entire
bill. [Points to someone who is sitting nearby drinking tea. Mulan and Li
Liang turn to see whom their benefactor is. Mulan grins when she recognizes
the Crown Prince]

Crown Prince: So, you two are the ones responsible for defeating the Tujue.

[Li Liang eyes Mulan guiltily, as if to say "looks like we're caught now"]
Don't try to deny it. Su Jili has already told me the entire story. [Li
Liang shoots Mulan a look as if to say "your underling sure has a big
mouth." Mulan is so embarrassed she turns her face away]

Mulan [muttering]: That greedy bastard.

Crown Prince: Regardless, my Sire has ordered me to bring you two back to
the palace no matter what. He wants to give you two your justly deserved
rewards.

Li Liang [demurring]: Your Highness, actually, we don't want any rewards. We
just want to go out and see the world.

Crown Prince: You'd best tell my Sire that yourself. Don't get me caught in
the middle of this one.

[Li Liang looks trapped and tongue-tied. Mulan tries to smile weakly at
their predicament]

[Cut to Emperor's quarters. Li Liang and Mulan are bowing before the Emperor
and Empress]

Emperor [raising both of them]: Rise. [To Li Liang] General Li, are you
displeased with me? You defeated the Tujue handily, then ran away without
receiving your reward to go see the world. You must not care about me.

Li Liang: Your Majesty, you are mistaken. We defeated the Tujue because the
gods above were looking after the Sui empire. It was not due to anything on
our behalf. I only wanted to serve my country, not gain glory for myself.

Emperor: You didn't need to hide this, though. I already put out fliers
everywhere to find our empire's heroes. Why didn't you come forward then?

Li Liang [humbly]: It was really nothing special on my part, your Majesty. I
know nothing outside army life and martial arts. I was afraid that your
Majesty, in a fit of generosity, would give me a government post. It wouldn'
t be right to use a simple person like me in a place of importance.

[Emperor chuckles at this and sits back down on his throne. The Crown Prince
steps forward]

Crown Prince: You've got guts, Li Liang. You not only dare to joke with me,
but you even have the guts to joke with my Sire.

Li Liang: I wouldn't dare tease his Majesty. Now that the Tujue have been
defeated and there is peace in the country again, you won't need us to serve
as soldiers anymore. Your Majesty, if you insist on giving me a reward, then
I'd like to request 300 head of cattle and sheep to take home and farm. That
would please me more than anything.

Mulan: Your Majesty, I would also like to ask for 100 head of cattle and
sheep. This way, I can return home and retire from the army.

Empress: Excellent. Bravo, General Li. Bravo, Lieutenant Hua. [Gets up and
stands beside the Emperor] They don't want riches and glory. [To Emperor]
You must not let such talent run away so easily.

Second Prince: Exactly, Sire. You must not let such talent slip away.

Crown Prince [to Li Liang]: Do you think my Sire doesn't have the sense to
appreciate talent? Of course he can't let you go. To waste such abilities on
farming and chopping wood is a travesty.

Li Liang [looking uncomfortable]: Your Majesty.
Emperor [puts his hand up]: No more words. The Tujue may have retreated, but
their thirst for conquest is still there. You two represent the flower of
the Sui army. You must fight for our country regardless of the consequences.
I won't give you government posts this time but I will restore your
commissions. Does that suit you?

[Mulan and Li Liang smile weakly and look at each other, unable to believe
the jam they are stuck in]

Crown Prince: I'm sorry that your plans to see the world have all gone up in
smoke. How about I take you two to see Mt. Tai and then stop by for a quick
drink at the local tavern? Won't that be fun?

[Mulan and Li Liang try to look pleased but fail rather miserably. Mulan
tries to laugh at the Crown Prince's joke but cannot seem to make it sound
sincere. She gives up when Li Liang shoots her a look]

[Cut to gates to Three Mile camp. Li Liang, Mulan, and the troops of her
platoon are following her back inside. She is telling them what happened in
the meeting with the Emperor]

Mulan: The Emperor offered us a government post AND 10,000 pieces of gold
apiece.

Pudgy: General Li, then you're rich!

Mulan: General Li told the Emperor that he didn't want to be rich, so he
returned all the gold. [The troops look saddened at the thought of the loss
of all that gold] However, the Emperor agreed to redistribute the gold to.
all the troops of Three Mile camp! [Cheers erupt in Mulan's platoon]

Soldier: General Li does not love glory and looks upon riches as dirt. He is
truly a man among men and a great hero.

Mulan [turns around angrily]: You're forgetting that you betrayed him for
money and power (reference earlier episode where his soldiers sold their
testimony to frame General Li; Mulan alone opted for punishment rather than
dishonor)! Aren't you ashamed of what you did? When he was in trouble, you
had no problems looking the other way, yet now you praise his moral
fortitude!

Li Liang [pulling Mulan aside]: Mulan, forget about it. You can't blame them
for what they did. [Mulan is still silently fuming. Li Liang turns to the
soldiers] That's all water under the bridge, so don't worry about it
anymore. In future, let us remain united. Come on, let's go have a drink!

[The soldiers start to cheer again]

[Cut to Mulan's quarters in camp. She walks in the door and sees her bedroom
is decorated with flowers and ribbons. Puzzled, she turns around and heads
back out the door, but stops]

Mulan [to herself]: That's funny. I didn't go to the wrong room. [Heads back
inside and throws the door open wide. She accidentally smacks Jili in the
jaw (he was standing behind the door)]

Mulan [sharply]: Jili, what are you doing?

Jili: I wanted to give you a surprise.

Mulan [eyes the room]: Are you right in the head? Why are you acting so
mysteriously? [Jili is rubbing his face where he was hit with the door]

Jili: I. I knew you were coming back, so I went out and redecorated your
rooms. I spent a lot of time and money on these things trying to make it
pretty for your return. I can understand if you don't want to thank me for
my efforts, but do you really need to scold me like that? Can't you see how
sad that makes me?

Mulan [guiltily]: Okay, I'm sorry. Come on, don't be so wishy-washy. You don
't look good when you act wishy-washy.

Jili: True, I know I'm not much of a looker. In fact, my looks probably
annoy you. I can't compare to Li Liang's handsome and studly features. You
are so deeply in love with him that you couldn't possibly love him more.

[Hearing this, Mulan starts to get mad and gives Jili a stiff shove]
Mulan [warningly]: What did you say?

Jili: If you want to hide your secret longer, you'd best not continue to
spend so much time with Li Liang alone, going here, and there, and all over
the place. You know what you've done with him; I needn't mention anything.
Mulan [furious]: You. you damned bastard! General Li and I have done nothing
to be ashamed of. When I'm with him, I don't remember that we are a man and
a woman. Not only is your mind filthy, but your whole body is filthy! Even
if I explained it all to you, you wouldn't understand. Oh, I see now. Your
concern for me is just a front. You've had your eye on me quite a while,
haven't you?

Jili [startled at this sudden attack]: Me have my eye on you?
Mulan: You can just forget about it, because I am not attracted to men like
you. From this day forth, I'm breaking off all contact with you. Now leave!
[She points to the door]

Jili [scared]: Mulan, please don't take this the wrong way. I've never had
any such thoughts about you. I think of you as my little sister.

Mulan [eyes him suspiciously]: Kid sister? Since when did you have so many
kid sisters?

Jili: I really did have a kid sister once. When she was twelve, she had the
chickenpox. She developed too much chicken essence in the pox, so she died.
(It's a pun in Chinese; I realize it's a pretty lame pun in English) She
left this world at the young age of twelve. It was such a tragedy. [Hearing
this, Mulan repents her earlier harshness towards Jili] You look quite like
her, so whenever I see you, I think of my sister. [He starts to bawl like a
baby]

Mulan [remorseful]: Don't do this to yourself. How was I supposed to know
you had a kid sister that died such a tragic death? Don't cry anymore, okay?
Tell you what. How about I call you "big brother" from now on?

Jili [still crying]: Okay. [Walks over to chair and sits down. Mulan walks
over and sits on his lap to give him a hug] I hope you never get chickenpox.
Promise me you'll never leave me.

[Cut to Emperor's quarters. The Crown Prince is hurrying out the door when
he runs into his father, mother, and younger brother]

Crown Prince: Sire, mother, good morning.

Empress: Going out this early in the morning?

Crown Prince: Oh no, the brothels aren't open this early. No, I mean, Sire,
didn't you say yesterday that you were going to give General Li a victory
celebration? I'm going to tell him in person. [Starts to head out the door,
but his father stops him]

Emperor: Come back here. You are the Crown Prince, not a gofer. You must
keep your dignity at all times. Have a servant do such things for you.

Crown Prince: Well, heck, even a Crown Prince is a person.

Empress: You're getting more and more ridiculous. I don't want to hear
another word out of you!

Emperor: Eunuch Gui, I want you to go tell General Li about this
celebration. [Eunuch Gui bows and hurries off]

[Cut to gate of Three Mile camp. General Li is addressing the troops of
Mulan's platoon]

General Li: The Emperor has invited us today to a victory celebration. You
must be on your best behavior and not do anything stupid. Don't dishonor
Lieutenant Hua today. [Puts his hand on Jili's shoulder] Especially you,

Jili. You are a very messy eater. Try to dine with a little more grace
tonight, okay?

Jili: Don't worry, I won't dishonor Boss today. I will make him proud
tonight. I'll eat with so much grace that he will be beaming with pride.
I'll win an award for my etiquette. [General Li nods in approval, then turns
around to look for Mulan. She walks up from outside the camp]

General Li: Where's Chenen?

Mulan: He said he has to meditate, so he won't be attending. He asked us to
send his regrets to the Emperor.

General Li: He's not going? Let me go talk to him.

Mulan: Wait. Leave him be. The Marshal's death hit him very hard. He needs
time to be by himself. [General Li, thinking it over, nods]

[Cut to Emperor's quarters. The guests are all gathered in front of the
Emperor and bowing before him]

Emperor: Men like General Li are truly rare and precious in their loyalty
and bravery. It is our empire's great fortune to have someone like him
fighting for us.

[The Emperor asks the Crown Prince to toast General Li, but they cannot
agree on what to toast. Various officials step in and suggest toasting the
Emperor. After numerous officials all toast the Emperor (in an attempt at
kissing up), Mulan gets fed up with all the brown-nosing and leaves the room
in disgust. General Li, seeing her leave, follows. She walks down the hall
and keeps clutching her stomach, as if the sight of all the politicking in
the previous room has left her nauseous]

General Li: Mulan, what's wrong?

Mulan [scowling]: He said he was holding this victory party in our honor.
It's become a grand kiss-up fest.

General Li: Oh, so our Lieutenant Hua isn't used to the sight of
brown-nosing, eh? [Chuckles at her discomfort]

Mulan: What's so funny?

General Li: I think I heard they were going to have dancing and plays
shortly. Let's go. [Tries dragging her back to the party, but she refuses]
Mulan: When I see all the brown-nosing, I lose my appetite. I think I'll
stay here and enjoy the fresh air.

General Li [clucking his dismay]: Mulan, look at yourself. You aren't even
trying to show your appreciation for the Emperor's good intentions. It's a
special treat to see so many high officials showing off their brown-nosing
skills. As long as you forget that the Emperor called this party to
celebrate our victory, then there's nothing to be mad about. [Sees Mulan is
still unconvinced] When you left, they were just starting to warm up with
their brown-nosing. It's your loss if you miss out on such a display.

Mulan: Oh, all right. You win.

[Several servants walk by, carrying trays of food and drink towards the main
room. Mulan and General Li watch them go by. General Li sees Mulan's
attention is wandering, so he waves his hands to wake her]

General Li: Mulan, are you well?

Mulan: Don't you find that those servants look awfully familiar? Where have
I seen them before?

General Li: This isn't the first time you've met the Emperor. I'm sure
you've seen his maids and eunuchs numerous times, also. What's unusual about
that? [Starts to head back to main room] Come on, I'm hungry.
Mulan: Wait a minute. Are you really hungry?

General Li: Yes, I am.

Mulan: Do you want to enjoy your food with gusto?

General Li: Of course.

Mulan: Then come this way. [Starts to shove him in the direction away from
the main room] Come on!

General Li: Where are we going? [Mulan doesn't respond and keeps pushing
him. They soon end up in the kitchen]

Mulan: Come on. [They both walk inside] How come there is not a soul in
here?

General Li: Maybe they all went to carry food in to the Emperor.

[Mulan opens a pot and her eyes grow wide when she sees the quantity of food
it contains. She starts to take out some of it to eat when General Li
expresses some reservations]

General Li: Isn't this stealing?

Mulan: Why is it stealing? We came in here openly to find something to eat.
Do you honestly think the Emperor will have us beheaded for eating a bit of
his food? Come on, don't be shy.

[They both grab several dishes and sit down at the table in the kitchen.
They start to dig in to the food with great gusto]

Mulan: I'm telling you, this is the best way to enjoy good food. And we
didn't even have to kiss-up to earn it. All we have to do is eat and be
merry. This is great!

General Li: Dig in, Waiter! (Reference to when they worked at a local tavern
in the previous episode)

Mulan [remembering something]: What did you say?

General Li: I said, "Dig in, Waiter!"

[Mulan suddenly stops eating. She remembers where she last heard someone use
that tone. It was back at the local tavern. She was waiting on a table of
guests that had just arrived. They had asked her to hurry up and give them
some simple fare and to cut the crap. She was suspicious of their behavior
at the time but forgot about it soon. She jumps when General Li taps her on
the shoulder]

General Li: Are you all right?

[Mulan jumps out of her seat and starts pacing back and forth]
Mulan: I've seen those people before. I've seen them before! I remember
seeing them at the local tavern where we worked as waiters. [Turns and sees
a vat with blood stains on the side. She screams in terror. General Li drags
Mulan back to the main room]

[Cut to main room. The Emperor and the rest of the crowd are all sitting
down and starting to eat their meal. A small dart flies across the room and
almost hits the Emperor. The room suddenly fills with attackers who are
trying to assassinate the Emperor. The Crown Prince tries to defend his
father but is soon knocked unconscious. The Second Prince fights off a
couple of attackers to make it look like he is doing something, then makes
his escape. General Li and Mulan are both fighting off several attackers. In
the midst of the chaos, General Li yells for Mulan to protect the Emperor.
She hurries to grab the Emperor and lead him from the room to the streets
outside. General Li remains behind to fight the remaining assassins, but the
lead assassin has seen Mulan taking the Emperor to safety so he follows]

[Cut to street outside. Mulan is leading the Emperor away but the lead
assassin is following behind. He jumps a fence and is gaining on them. Mulan
shoves the Emperor aside and starts to fight the assassin in hand to hand
sword combat. They fight for several minutes, with neither side gaining the
upper hand. The assassin manages to hack a large wound in Mulan's upper left
chest. She falls to the ground. Seeing the assassin coming closer to finish
her off, she swiftly kicks her fallen sword in the assassin's direction. Her
sword pierces his body and continues through to impale itself on the tree
behind him (it's a story, so please suspend your disbelief). The assassin
falls to the ground, dead. Mulan staggers to her feet in obvious pain.

General Li comes running up]
General Li: Your Majesty, are you hurt?

Emperor: I'm fine. However, hurry up and go see how Lieutenant Hua is doing.
I believe he needs a doctor immediately!

[General Li runs up to Mulan and sees she is wounded]

General Li: Mulan, are you hurt?
Mulan [gritting her teeth]: I'm fine.

Emperor: You're fine? But I saw the assassin take a wicked hack at your
chest.

General Li: Are you sure you are alright?
Mulan [faking she is healthy]: Of course I'm alright. If you don't believe me,
we can spar right now and I can prove to you that I am well.

Emperor: Soldier, go fetch the Imperial doctor to take a look at Lieutenant
Hua's wound. [Soldier hurries off]

Mulan: Really, your Majesty. I'm fine.

Emperor: That knife stroke was too close for comfort.

Mulan: Yes, your Majesty.[winces at the pain of her wound]

[Cut to Mulan's quarters. Jili and General Li are helping Mulan in the door.
Her wound is much more serious than it appeared initially. Her hand is
covered in blood, but she is still able to walk under her own steam. Pudgy
and Monkey also follow, concerned for their officer. She sits down painfully
on her bed and tries not to show how much pain she is feeling. Everyone is
watching her with concern]

Mulan [turning to General Li and company]: I'm fine now. It's just a little
blood. Nothing to be afraid of.

General Li: Your color doesn't look too good.

Mulan: Really? Your color isn't that great either. [Jili reaches over to
touch his hand to her left hand, which she is using to cover her wound. She
jerks away at his touch] What are you doing?

Jili: I wanted to see if you are running a fever. Your hand is awfully cold.

Mulan: I almost lost my life against those SOB's, plus I got a nasty cut
from one of them. So I'm still breaking out in a cold sweat over the
thought.

Pudgy: Boss, should I go make you a bowl of herbal medicine?

Mulan: Alright.

Monkey: Boss, your clothing is torn. Do you want me to go get someone to
mend it for you?

Mulan: Alright. [Monkey reaches over to help her take her outer clothing off,
but she jerks away] No wait. I saved the Emperor today. I want to preserve
this shirt for my children and grandchildren to see. I want to show them the
heroic deed i have done today. [She thumps herself on her chest to emphasize this, but
winces when she hits her wound]

General Li [concerned]: Does it hurt terribly?

Mulan: No. It doesn't hurt that much. [Diverts the subject] Actually, I'm
rather tired. Please leave now. We can talk about stuff later tonight. Go
now. [Starts to wave them off] Go. [Jili starts to herd them out the door.
After everyone leaves, Mulan bars the door behind them. She checks her chest
wound with her right hand and sees it is covered with blood. She leans
against the door and slowly sinks to the floor in a faint, no doubt due to
loss of blood]

[Cut to Chenen's quarters. General Li walks in to where Chenen is sitting
down]

General Li: Chenen! I have some good news for you.

Chenen: What good news?

General Li: The Emperor is going to promote you. He said that you deserve
some credit for saving the Crown Prince this time. He was greatly pleased
with the strategy you used against the Tujue and he said you have earned
your father's post. He told me to ask you to go to the Marshal's residence
to receive your new commission.

Chenen [shaking his head in disbelief]: I caused the problem in the first
place. My father died as a result of my incompetence. I can't accept this
commission.

General Li: You have to stop blaming yourself. The Emperor and Crown Prince
agree that you were not at fault and do not blame you for these recent
events.

Chenen: Others may not blame me, but I blame myself. I know how deeply my
sins run; I do not deserve any rewards.

General Li: But you can't ignore a royal command. If you reject his
commission, you may anger him.

[Cut to Mulan's quarters. Pudgy is outside her door with a bowl of medicine
for Mulan. He knocks on the door several times and calls for her to open the
door, but she doesn't respond. She is still leaning against the door and
sitting on the floor in a faint. She slowly rouses herself awake and
groggily gets up]

Pudgy [shouting]: Boss, are you all right in there? If something is wrong,
give me a holler. Boss, say something. If you don't respond, I'm going to
come in!

Mulan [grimacing in pain]: I'm. I'm changing my clothes. Give me a minute,
please. [She changes out of her bloody clothing and into another outfit. She
then opens the door for Pudgy]

Pudgy: Boss, I made you a fresh batch of herbal medicine for you. It's
supposed to help heal injuries.

Mulan [taking the bowl and setting it on the table]: Thank you. Everyone is
making such a fuss over me. There's really nothing wrong with me. Go back
and rest, all of you. [Pudgy nods and leaves the room. She shuts the door behind
him and starts to head back to bed when General Li walks in]

General Li: Mulan. How are you feeling?

Mulan [getting impatient]: I'm fine. You people keep coming to annoy me with
your concern.

General Li: You don't appreciate that so many people worry about your
welfare? [Looks closer] Your color isn't very good.

Mulan [shortly]: I'm fine.

General Li [still concerned]: But your condition still worries me.

Mulan: Really, there's nothing wrong with me. Do I look like there's
something wrong me? I'm just tired out from the big fight we had against the
assassins. All I need is a good night's sleep and tomorrow I'll be good as
new. [General Li looks rather skeptically at Mulan, but says nothing] Go
back and rest.

General Li: All right. Take care of yourself and get some rest.

[Cut to barracks. Jili is tossing and turning on his bed. He wakes up with a
start, then sneaks out of the barracks. He heads toward Mulan's quarters.
Mulan is still awake in bed, unable to sleep from the pain. Jili pounds on
her door]

Mulan [calling out]: Who is it?

Jili [whispering loudly]: Mulan, it's me.

Mulan: What do you want?

Jili: It's Jili.

Mulan [repeating herself]: I said, what do you want?

Jili: It's Jili. Open up and we'll talk. [With a scowl, she gets up and
walks over to unbar the door for him. He comes in and immediately shuts it
after himself]

Mulan: What the heck do you want in the middle of the night?

Jili: How are you?

Mulan [impatient]: I'm telling you, I'm fine. Would you people just leave me
alone?

Jili: Stop putting on a brave front. I know you are suffering. I care about
you, that's why I came to see how you are doing.

Mulan [insistent]: Really, there's nothing wrong with me. Go back to sleep.

Jili: Fine. I'll go back to bed. Before I do, though, I want to see you do
some pushups. [Mulan looks worried at this request, as she knows she can't
do them with her wounded chest] If there's nothing wrong with you, I'll go
back to bed. [Sees she is hesitating] You usually can do 100 or more without
any problems. All I want you to do is two pushups. That's not too much to
ask. Go ahead.

[Seeing there is no way out of his request, Mulan gingerly tries to get in
position to do pushups. She only leans over part way before she stops with a
loud groan of pain. Jili hurries to her side]

Jili: Mulan, what's wrong? [Mulan shoves away his hand]

Mulan: Don't touch me!

Jili: If I don't miss my guess, you must be pretty badly injured. Why didn't
you go see the doctor? Are you trying to throw your life away?

Mulan [balled up and grimacing in pain]: I'll take care of my own injuries.
What business is it to you?

Jili [panicking]: This is neither the time nor place to keep putting on a
brave front. If you don't see a doctor, you are at risk of dying at any
time! [Calms himself down] No, you will be fine. You saved the Emperor this
time; even if he were to find out you are a woman disguised as a man, he
won't have you executed.

Mulan: I don't care about anyone finding out my secret. However, I would
rather die than have any man behold my body. Jili, I was brought up
rough-and-tumble. Plus, my mother often beat me until I was black and blue.
I was often wounded in one place or another. After a few days, I was alright
again. [Winces] Good as new. I'm fine. Go back... [Tries to get up but
grimaces in great pain]

Jili [scolding]: You've never let being a woman stop you from anything. You
are risking your life. This is not the time to be a hero. This is not the
solution; I'm going to take you to see the camp doctor. [Grabs her arm and
starts to drag her toward the door]

Mulan [pulling away]: Jili! If you make so much noise again, I'll cut our
ties! [Relenting] Brother Yu brought some creams for me earlier. After
applying them, the pain isn't as bad as it was. Don't worry about me. I can
bear it. Go back, please? [She starts to get up to escort him out the door,
but Jili pushes her back to the bed]

Jili: That's all right. You don't need to escort me. I'll let myself out,
okay? Just get some rest. [Heads out door, then pops his head back in] Get
some rest, please? [Heads out door, then pops his head back in] Get some rest,
okay? [Mulan nods, then she falls asleep, exhausted from the pain and the
day's activities]
 

[Cut to Emperor's quarters. The Emperor is sitting on his throne with his
two sons standing to his right. A soldier walks in and reports that he has
searched high and low, but is unable to find Colonel Yu. The Emperor looks
displeased, while General Li looks worried and chagrined]

Emperor [to General Li]: Did you tell him that I wanted to grant him this
commission?

General Li: Your Majesty, I spoke with him yesterday.

Second Prince: How dare he flout your will, Sire! Since he doesn't seem to
want this commission, then perhaps you should not give it to him.

Emperor: General Li, when you told him I wanted to give him this post, how
did he react?

General Li [hedging]: Er...

Crown Prince: Even if he didn't want this post, he should have come to tell
my Sire in person. How could he just walk off with nary a word? He is
thumbing his nose at my Sire's imperial authority! [To Emperor] Sire, I
think you should order your men to capture him and bring him back here for
punishment.

[A servant announces the arrival of Colonel Yu. Everyone turns to see the
new arrival. Chenen walks in, but he is not dressed in his military uniform.
He is wearing a deep blue outfit that monks wear, plain and unadorned. He
walks in and kneels before the Emperor]

Emperor [in surprise and dismay]: You are Yu Chenen? (The Emperor has never
met him before)

Chenen: Yes, I am. I apologize for my tardiness; I was busy in meditation,
so I was unable to arrive here on time.

Emperor [shaking his head]: Why? Why did you give up your post as colonel in
my army to become a priest of the Tao?

Chenen [calmly]: My soul is tainted with immeasureable sins. My arrogance
caused the death of so many, even my own father. I have chosen to become a
priest that I might wash away this nightmare.

Crown Prince [sneering]: My Sire had great plans for you. He wanted to give
you a commission, yet you decided to become a priest without even mentioning
it to him. You have dishonored and disrespected him!

Chenen: I had no intention of disrespecting your Majesty. I am sickened by
my old thirst for power and glory. I only wish to atone for my sins.

Second Prince [angry]: You don't know what's good for you! If other people
heard that you had refused my Sire's imperial commission, how do you expect
him to show his face anymore? [To Emperor] Sire, you should either force him
to accept this commission or have him executed.

Chenen [calmly]: Life and death are in the order of things. These things do not
matter to a priest of the Tao.

Second Prince [still angry]: What kind of attitude is this? [To Emperor]
Sire, you must punish him severely.

Emperor [waves his hand]: You are dismissed. [Gratefully, Chenen leaves]

[Cut to Mulan's quarters. She is asleep when Chenen walks in. He heads over
to her bed. Waking up, Mulan gets up]

Chenen: You're still wounded, be more careful.

Mulan [eyes his new attire]: Am I dreaming?

Chenen: No, you're not dreaming. I truly have chosen to become a priest.

Mulan: Why?

Chenen: What is so wrong with joining the priesthood? I have abandoned the
torment of my former life to find peace in a new one.

Mulan [forlorn]: Being a priest is a hardship. You won't have any
friends and you will never have a permanent home, roaming the world until
you die.

Chenen: My soul is stained with so many sins. In this new life, I will find the
way to redemption.

Mulan: But you don't need to become a priest to redeem yourself.

Chenen: No, that's where you're wrong. Becoming a priest is not a hardship,
but freedom. I have found peace and harmony in this life as though I have been reborn.
For me, there is no more killing, no envy, nor hatred. You should be happy for me.

Mulan: Are you really happy?

Chenen: What I feel is neither joy nor sorrow. I am at peace. This is what I have
sought for so long. I must go now. Take care of yourself. [Turns to leave. Mulan
grabs his sleeve]

Mulan [wistfully]: Brother Yu, will I ever see you again?

Chenen [giving her hand a kind pat]: Li Liang is a good man. Learn to
appreciate him for all that he is. [Leaves the room. Mulan sadly watches him go]

[Cut to city street. Jili is walking alone and swinging some packages in his
hands. He sees General Li heading in his direction and does an abrupt
about-face. He hurriedly stuffs the packages under his chest armor in an
attempt at hiding them from General Li]

General Li: Su Jili!

Jili: Good morning, General Li. [Tries to hide his bulging chest. General Li
initially does not notice and simply returns the greeting. He takes a few
steps and pauses, then turns around]

General Li: Jili, turn around. [Jili obeys. His chest is bulging as if he
suddenly sprouted breasts] What's wrong with your chest?

Jili: Um... you won't believe what happened to me yesterday, General Li. I was
stung twice by some vicious bees!

General Li [playing along]: Oh, you were stung by bees, eh? They must have
been very poisonous bees. I bet they were the infamous tiger bees. I've
heard that their poison is so potent that if you ignore a sting, the poison
will spread throughout your body and will kill you in seven days. It will
literally eat your insides out.

Jili: Then I better hurry and see a doctor. [Tries to run off, but General
Li stops him]

General Li: No need. I know just how to leach the poison out of your system.
Let me spin you around. [Turns Jili around several times. The packages he
tucked underneath his chest armor come flying out and hit the ground] See?
The "poison" has come out. [He bends to pick up the packages and notices an
unusual smell. His face hardens] Who is going to use this medicine? [Jili
tries to come up with an excuse but is tongue-tied] Is it Hua Mulan?

Jili [stuttering]: No... no... Actually, I was gambling with some soldiers from
Flying Tiger camp on a fencing match and lost a lot of money. I
decided to smuggle some medicine from the canteen to sell on the black
market so I could pay off my losses. [General Li is not deceived in the
least and angrily grabs Jili's collar]

General Li: Do you take me for a three year-old?

[Cut to Mulan's quarters. General Li is dragging Jili to see Mulan. They
walk inside, but see that her room is empty. Jili is still carrying the
packages of medicine in his arms]

General Li: Mulan, where are you?

Jili [muttering]: Oh no.

General Li: What?

[Monkey and Pudgy walk in to the room. They are both carrying fancy cloth
and draperies]

General Li: Have either of you two seen Lieutenant Hua today?

Monkey: He went to see the Emperor. Eunuch Gui came by earlier today and
dropped off these presents from the Emperor, saying the Emperor wished to
see him. They just left.

General Li: Did you notice anything unusual about Lieutenant Hua this
morning? [Both Monkey and Pudgy shake their heads]

Jili: See, I wasn't lying to you. These medicines really are for me to get
some money to pay back those soldiers from Flying Tiger camp. This really
has absolutely nothing to do with Boss.

General Li: Go on with you! You almost gave me a heart attack the way you
were acting so sneaky and suspicious. I thought Lieutenant Hua was in
serious trouble. [Holds up a package] Return these medicines to wherever you
stole them from. Later, tell me how much money you owe and I'll pay it for
you.

Jili: Thank you, General. [Starts to run off, but General Li stops him]

General Li: Don't you EVER gamble again, it's your ass if you do!

Jili: Yes, sir! [Runs off]